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Shout Out To My Ex, How Do I Find My Next?

The first thing that your friends and family will tell you after any breakup is, ‘Don’t rush into anything too quickly’, ‘Take your time’, ‘Find yourself’, ‘You don’t need anyone to be happy’. But let’s face it, it is easier said than done. Often, the minute we label ourselves single, we start wondering who is around the corner. Secretly, we hope that the ‘next one’ will be ‘the one’ and that he/she will be an upgrade from our most recent ‘ex’ mistake. Most of us are guilty of this and that is okay – being ‘alone’ isn’t the nicest feeling in the world and most us crave someone to split a pizza and spend a lazy Sunday with.

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You are not the only one sailing the ‘Single Boat’.

Thousands and thousands of people download dating apps every day in search of a new relationship or companion. Whether you are ready to enter the dating scene or not, there is no shame in spending your downtime swiping through profiles – some may even spark your interest. The key thing to note is that there really is no rush to start seeing other people but these apps can be a good distraction and confidence boost.

Less about we, more about me.

Sure, all your friends may be in relationships and you might feel like the odd one out but that doesn’t mean that they don’t have time for you. Spending one on one time with a best friend or even being a ‘third wheel’ can actually be a good time. You will start to get to know your friends better and the focus will be less on ‘you both’ and more about you. Take the spotlight. News of your new -found singlehood will slowly hit your friends network and you will find yourself being invited to loads of social events.

Slow and Steady wins the race

We have all heard the term, ‘rebound’ and most of us have either ‘rebounded’ or have been someone’s rebound. Even though finding a new partner straight away may help to heal the wounds from your ex, it is not fair to the person you are dating or yourself. Make sure that you are seeing your new partner for all the right reasons. If you find yourself hoping that your ex will find out and get jealous, you are probably seeing this person for all the wrong reasons. There are instances where people do meet their perfect someone straight after a break up but again, it may be best to take things slowly.

Say Yes

After time, you will find that you no longer spend evenings dwelling over your ex or looking at pictures of your last holiday in the sun together, wondering where it all went wrong. At this point, you need to start enjoying life and saying ‘yes’ to every social event that you are invited to. Even if you want to meet someone new or just have a good time, getting yourself out there is key to rebuilding your new life as a single person.

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