The Divorce Solicitor’s Guide To A Successful Marriage

The Divorce Solicitor’s Guide To A Successful Marriage

The Pros And Cons Of A Pre-nup

Perhaps you would not be inclined to seek marriage advice from a divorce solicitor, but then again, perhaps you would given the fact that they rarely tend to get divorced themselves (read our article about why this is so here). Divorce lawyers have witnessed countless marriages collapse and, in the process, have been granted detailed insight into the most common causes for relationship breakdowns. It’s not surprising then to note that they consequently know a thing or two about what not to do when building a marriage, and this in turn does shed some light on what exactly is effective for nurturing a successful relationship. Below, we’ve collated some key tips from our solicitors based on their experience in family law.

Communication Is Key

The first, and probably most obvious of these, is the importance of practicing regular, open, and honest communication. It’s safe to say that a misunderstanding of some kind tends to be at the crux of almost every conflict that ultimately leads to a broken marriage. When spouses fail to effectively communicate their needs, wants, and/or feelings to each other, this leaves room for a variety of problematic behaviours to take root and begin growing within their relationship. For example, one spouse may start to harbour resentment against the other for something they did which upset them. Instead of choosing to address the issue and talk it through, they may choose instead to distance themselves from their partner in an effort to avoid further disappointment or to make a statement. However, if the other partner doesn’t inherently understand why this is happening (no one can read minds!), they might jump to other nefarious conclusions, causing even more strife in the relationship. Spouses can of course avoid such misunderstandings by simply taking the time to check in daily with each other to ensure that their expectations and goals in the relationship are consistently aligned. Being prepared to compromise and to breach sensitive topics is the key to success here and this brings us on to our next point.

Don’t Be Afraid To Talk Money

Be transparent about your finances with each other. Yes, this can be a difficult subject to broach, but it is crucial to make sure that you and your partner are on the same page about your financial affairs, especially when co-habiting. When couples get divorced, they are almost always fighting over money – who gets what, should pay for this, or is owed that. Even within an ongoing relationship, such questions can still feel like a challenge and so making sure that your financial (and practical) roles and responsibilities within your relationship are clearly set out from the outset should be a top priority. It’s also important to have a clear understanding of any debts or purchases that your partner may incur (or have already incurred) so that you can both be in agreement about how to manage your money. Remember the saying ‘What’s yours is mine and what’s mine is yours’? Well, that is generally the rule when it comes to marriage, given that all your assets legally become jointly owned as part of the ‘martial pot’. It is therefore essential for both of you to always be involved whenever making any major financial decisions as the consequences will affect the both of you.

Weathering Life’s Events

Major financial decisions can often also be accompanied by major life events. It can be easy to assume that most marriages tend to end in divorce over something like infidelity or domestic abuse. However, the reality is that most separations are related to a life event – such as the loss of a job or family member, a serious illness, or having children who suffer from significant medical issues. Situations like these generally tend to take a significant emotional, physical, and psychological toll on people, and this can have a knock-on effect on their relationships. Feeling unusually irritable, stressed, or maybe even a bit depressed as a result of an ongoing life event can temporarily change people’s behaviours in a significant way. Learning to cultivate patience with yourself and your partner as you navigate life’s ups and downs will enable you to support each other in facing your challenges together, instead of falling apart over them.

Seeking Help When You Need It

If things continue to become increasingly challenging, then it is also a good idea to consider consulting a therapist. Although this can sometimes seem like an embarrassing or even frightening step to take, the benefits of having a third perspective from a trained professional on any issues that you might be facing are worth it. A psychologist can help improve your mental health by assisting you in developing healthier coping mechanisms in the event that you’ve been feeling depressed or overwhelmed by life. Alternatively, a couples’ therapist could help you and your partner to better understand each other’s perspectives on an issue that may feel insurmountable to you both, thus helping you to move forward from conflict and strengthen your relationship. Anything that facilitates each of you to be the best of yourselves and to treat others with greater patience and kindness as a result will ultimately only benefit your relationship. There have been so many marriages that could have been saved if both parties had simply chosen to get the help they needed instead of parting ways. Marriage is a joint venture and it’s important to remember that you’re both on the same team. You both win if your marriage succeeds, so it’s worth doing what you can to make that happen.

With all the above being said, sometimes marriages do eventually run their course, and there is no shame in choosing to end a relationship that fundamentally doesn’t serve you or your partner. If you are considering a divorce or a separation, our solicitors are well-equipped to advise you on a wide range of family law matters including financial settlements, child custody, international living arrangements, domestic abuse and more. Our team also understands that this is a sensitive time in people’s lives and we have a variety of other services at our clients’ disposal to support them through it, including therapy, personal coaching, and financial planning. Don’t hesitate to book your free consultation today to find out more about how we can help.

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Regular Catch-up Strategies

At Grayfords, we understand the importance of developing effective strategies to achieve the desired outcomes for our clients in family law and private client law matters. That's why we prioritise regular catch-up strategies to ensure that your case is handled efficiently and aligned with your goals. 

As experienced family and private client lawyers, and strategy experts, we recognise that every case is unique and requires a tailored approach. Through regular catch-up sessions, we engage in open and collaborative discussions with our clients to gain a thorough understanding of their objectives, concerns, and preferences. These ‘catch-ups’ allow us to assess the progress of your case, identify any evolving needs or challenges, and adjust our strategies accordingly. We are also then able to put in place any personal support our clients may need should they wish to avail themselves of our coaching and therapy & mental health services at any point during their legal matter.

By maintaining regular communication, we can provide you with updates on the status of your case, share important information, and address any questions or concerns you may have. This proactive approach ensures that you are actively involved in the decision-making process and empowers you to make informed choices throughout the legal proceedings. 

Our aim is to ensure that your case is being handled in the most efficient and effective way possible. Through our regular catch-up strategies, we can evaluate the success of our current strategies, make necessary adjustments, and optimise our approach to maximise the chances of achieving a favourable outcome for you. 

At Grayfords, we value your input and understand that your goals are essential to the success of your case. Our commitment to regular catch-up strategies reflects our dedication to providing personalised and client-centered legal services. By working together, we can create a strong partnership and develop strategies that align with your vision and aspirations. 

Strategic Partnerships​

At Grayfords, we believe in the power of strategic partnerships to enhance the quality and efficiency of our legal services. We understand that legal matters often require expertise in various specialised areas, and that's why we have established strong relationships with trusted and renowned specialists in both family law, private client law, and therapy and mental health support.

Our strategic partnerships enable us to provide a streamlined and comprehensive legal service to our clients. When your case requires consultation or assistance in specific areas of the law, we have the resources and connections to quickly and efficiently engage the right experts. 

Whether it's a complex family law issue or a multifaceted private client law matter, our network of trusted specialists allows us to draw upon their knowledge and experience to provide the best possible advice and representation for our clients. These partnerships ensure that we can offer comprehensive solutions that address all aspects of your case, providing you with a holistic approach to your legal (and personal) needs. 

By collaborating with specialists in various legal fields, we can navigate intricate legal challenges more effectively, saving you time, effort, and potential complications. Our commitment to strategic partnerships means that we stay informed about the latest developments in family law and private client law, ensuring that our advice and strategies are up-to-date and relevant. 

At Grayfords, we value the importance of offering a well-rounded legal service to our clients. Our strategic partnerships enable us to tap into a wealth of expertise and resources, ultimately enhancing the quality and effectiveness of our services. You can trust that we have the necessary connections to consult with specialists whenever needed, ensuring that every aspect of your case is addressed with proficiency and efficiency while also supporting you on a personal level as needed.

Time for you

At Grayfords, we understand the value of time, and we prioritise our clients by ensuring that they receive the attention and support they need throughout their legal journey. Unlike other family law and firms, we never claim to be too busy for our clients. We believe that effective communication is essential, and our team is always accessible and responsive to your needs.

Whether you have a question, or concern, or need an update on your case, our dedicated team of family law and private client law experts will be readily available to assist you. We go the extra mile to ensure that you can reach us conveniently and promptly. You can count on us to answer your calls or reply to your messages on platforms like WhatsApp, enabling efficient and effective communication.

Our commitment to internal collaboration and dynamism ensures that there is always someone available to address your family law or private client law case. We understand that legal matters can be time-sensitive, and we strive to provide timely and accurate advice. You can rely on our team's collective knowledge and expertise to guide you through the complexities of family law and private client law.

At Grayfords, we recognise that your time is valuable, and we respect that by being responsive, accessible, and dedicated to your case. We prioritise open and transparent communication, keeping you informed and involved every step of the way. You can trust that we will dedicate the necessary time and attention to your legal matters, ensuring that you feel supported and well taken care of.

Specialised Service

At Grayfords, we offer a specialised range of services across both family law and private client law, tailored to meet the unique needs of our clients. With a focus on honesty, empathy, and pragmatism, we provide reliable legal advice that is designed to help our clients achieve success in their legal matters. 

In the realm of family law, we understand the emotional challenges that can arise during sensitive family disputes. Our team of experienced family law solicitors provides compassionate support and guidance throughout the process. Whether you are going through a divorce, child custody battle, or dealing with complex property division, we have the expertise to navigate these intricate matters while prioritising your best interests. 

In the field of private client law, we recognise the complexities and demands that business owners and HNWIs face in today's dynamic marketplace. Our private client law services encompass a wide range of areas including wealth planning, asset management, trusts, wills, probate, and lasting powers of attorney. We aim to be your trusted legal partner, offering strategic advice and solutions that align with your commercial objectives as you navigate your family matter. 

At Grayfords, we believe in fostering long-term exceptional working relationships with our clients. Our dedicated team goes above and beyond to understand your unique circumstances and provide tailored legal solutions that anticipate your individual needs. We pride ourselves on delivering an outstanding personal service level, ensuring that you feel supported and informed throughout your legal journey.  

Our ultimate goal is to alleviate the pressure and stress often associated with legal matters. We are committed to guiding you through the complexities of family law and private client law, allowing you to focus on what matters most to you. Trust Grayfords to provide you with the specialised legal services you deserve, backed by our expertise, integrity, and dedication to your success.